As I was looking at my garden last week, I noticed weeds beginning to sprout up through the soil. I ignored them, because who has time for that? Well, just a few short days later, they were sprouting everywhere, wrapping around my plants and taking over!
I thought about that as a metaphor for our minds as we prepare for birth…one weed that says ‘I’m not strong enough’ when left to grow, will begin to sprout other weeds, that eventually leave you feeling powerless and fearful.
Let’s pull those weeds and not give them an opportunity to take over!
❌ I can’t- this phrase is common. We allow ourselves to be patients instead of taking charge of our care. Know your options and be informed. This will change your mindset from ‘I can’t’ to ‘I can, and I understand the benefits and the risks of that choice.’
❌ I’m not powerful enough- let’s shift that mindset to all the things you have done, all the things you are capable of! I can do hard things. I can handle anything for a 60 seconds. I can create a plan so I feel powerful and safe
❌ I don’t need a plan- Having a plan doesn’t mean you’re bound by it, it creates a sense of autonomy, safety and empowerment towards your care, no matter what path your labor/birth takes. Knowledge.is.power.
❌ It’s going to be exactly like my moms birth- sometimes we get bound by others experiences…there stories become ours. Birth is unique and has countless variations, choices and paths…carve your own path, write your own story
❌ The epidural will solve everything- It might solve your pain, but it also comes with risks and considerations. Think about your goal in Childbirth, and write it down…this goal will help you make autonomous decisions
❌ My care team will make the right decisions- Maybe? Your care team may suggest a procedure or intervention but it doesn’t mean that’s the only option, or even the best option. Only you know your values and lived experience to make an informed choice. Research has found that a positive birth experience has nothing to do with the length of labour or the interventions used, it has to do with whether or not the birthing person felt supported and part of the decision making.
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